Kids say the darndest things

"When I was your age, I wore pull-ups, but now I wear underwear!"

Line of the day as delivered by Jessa (age 2.986) to Zev (age 2.986 plus 4 minutes).

Funny Kid Stuff

Eliana

Eliana was sleeping in our bed and I went to move her to her own. She was completely dead to the world. As I picked her up, still dreaming, she started moving her hand as if it was swinging from the elbow (think Rodney Dangerfield after the ball struck him in Caddyshack), the said:

One little idee idee with the hand...a-cat-a-DOO-la!

The voice she used was weird too. As if she had just inhaled helium. She then was real quiet and passed a huge gas. So, I am not sure what my kid dreams about, but it seems quite whack.

Jessa

After dropping Jessa off at daycare this week, Dorann realized she had forgotten to sign her and Zev in. She went back to the room to sign them in and Jessa was very pleased to see her. She says, "Mommy, you came back!"

Dorann: Yes, I did, Jessa. Mommy forgot to sign you in.

Jessa: (small pause) Mommy, you're so funny.

Zev

Zev was such a helpful guy this week. I had made bagels for the big 3 to eat while we got ready in the morning. Zev was happy to be the delivery boy for his sisters. He brings their bagels up the stairs and gives them to Eliana and Jessa with a "Here you go!" and provides "You're welcome!" in response to their thank yous.

Kid-isms

1) Jessa: I saw that dear, mommy!
Dorann: What it a boy dear or a girl dear
Jessa: A boy dear
Dorann: How did you know it was a boy dear?
Jessa: Because it had knees.

2) Doug: This is the song mommy and daddy danced to at their wedding.
Eliana: I didn't get to see that.
Doug: But you have seen the video of it.
Eliana: But I wasn't here yet. I was with Mr. God.

3) Zev: Daddy, mommy is pretty!
Doug: You should go tell mommy that.
Zev: Mommy, you're pretty (hugs and kisses)
Dorann: *speechless*

4) Jessa and Eliana brush Davica's hair.
Davica: smiles
Zev tickles her feet.
Davica: smiles
Jessa brings her a toy
Davica: smiles

Barf

As a father of four, you may be surprised to learn that I am somewhat petrified of barf. Greatly fear doing it myself, abhor the thought of it, don't really even like jokes about it. 

So today, much to my chagrin, I was full-scale barfed on by my middle daughter (27 months old). The poor thing was running a fever and we had just gotten out of the car. As I was carrying her into the house, she unloaded all over my shirt and pants. And to be fair, all over herself. 

I started to wonder if I am perhaps lucky for going so long as a father without this happening before. Sure, when infants, the kids have crapped, spit-up, drooled and peed on me. For some reason, that didn't really bother me. The horror of looking down and seeing recognizable food items on my shirt was not exactly the best part of my day. 

After getting the sickly little girl inside, I cleaned her up, read her some stories and rocked her to sleep. I have checked on her about 4 times since she went to sleep and all seems well. Here is to her speedy recovery.

Presidential Commentary

Earlier in the day, Eliana, (now 3 and a half), Jessa and Zev (both 22 months) were excited to see the president's helicopter fly over our house. The kids looked and pointed. I told Eliana that the president of the United States, flies in that machine. She added, "of America!"

Later, while eating lunch, we were talking about seeing the helicopter with Dorann and she asked Eliana if she knew the president's name. Before I give her response, know that we generally don't discuss politics with the kids and have never given her our opinion of the current administration. Her reply:

"Turkey!"

More Goofy Ellie Stories

I believe that all parents love to hear the creative ways their children learn to interact with others in the world. One of my favorite stories was relayed to me by our daycare provider. But first some background:

Ellie has a stuffed doggy that was originally mine. My mother gave both me and Dorann these stuffed dogs as a gift one time when she visited. We had kept them in our room where they were appreciated, but not really embraced until our daughter Ellie was old enough to recognize them. Ellie likes all animals, but is especially excited by dogs. One of her first words was "doggy" and anyone walking their dog past our house is greeted with a voracious chorus of "doggy, doggy!"

For whatever reason, she has decided that the stuffed dog that was originally mine, is the preferred doggy and is to be with her as much as is possible. The other doggy, originally Dorann's, is offered for guests to hold. Sort of like a proactive peace offering to keep other's filthy mitts off her doggy.

About two month's ago, Ellie had held onto the doggy as we gathered her belongings to go to daycare. I had no problem with her bringing the doggy there for the day. The following was relayed to me by one of the teachers when I picked her up that afternoon:

Ellie was holding her doggy and playing with the other children and at some point, dropped her doggy. Her friend Megan (about 2 months older) picked up the doggy and decided she liked it. Ellie immediately noticed, but did not freak out. She politely asked Megan, "doggy, please" and held out her hands. Megan refused. Ellie again asked, "doggy, please" to again be rebuked by Megan.

Our little negotiator then pulled the pacifier out of Megan's mouth (taking Megan's most prized possession) and once again asked "doggy, please". To which, Megan immediately handed over the doggy and Ellie returned the pacifier.

I give the little girl high marks for solving the doggy dilemma non-violently and with style! Which was quite good for a 17 month old!

Stories from the Gwib Side

As we were drying our 19-month old daughter off after her bath, she started singing "rock-a-bye baby". To our extreme surprise, Ellie belted out the following line:

Rock a bye baby, doggy peacock!