Verizon Tech Scheduling

These guys seem to believe their advertising. Believe it or not, their products are no better than anyone else and their service stinks. Below is an approximate schedule of every call I made or received to attempt to move the ONT box from the back of our house to the side:

Call#	Approx Date	Purpose
1	12/1/2008	Request technician come and move box
2	12/2/2008	Call back from verizon to choose date for tech to visit
3	12/5/2008	Visit from tech. Tech determined I needed to schedule a visit through his supervisor to have work completed
4	12/26/2008	Called supervisor to schedule ONT box move. He suggested I call toll free # to schedule the move.
5	12/26/2008	Called toll free number from above. Person suggests I call different toll free number to schedule the move.
6	12/26/2008	Call new toll free number and put in request again. Told to expect call in 24 hours to schedule visit from tech to perform service.
7	12/28/2008	Received call from Verizon. Indicated I put in a maintenance request and need to call back with a new service request. I refuse and suggest they call me back from the proper department.
8	12/28/2008	Received call from supervisor I contacted in call #4. He indicated I should call back with a new service request. I refuse and suggest they should figure out who does the service and call me back.
9	12/30/2008	After not receiving a call from Verizon, I call back supervisor from call #4. He indicates the he received the "same run-around" that I received. He promised to come on Friday to complete the work.

To be continued on Friday....

Bowl Results volume 2

SAN DIEGO COUNTY CREDIT UNION POINSETTIA BOWL
(9) Boise St 16
*(11) TCU 17

I was a bit concerned about this game after BYU got so thoroughly dominated the other night by the crap-ola Arizona (you should know that Stoops has parlayed his first winning season and crappy bowl victory into a 3 year contract extension. Dick Tome must be dying inside to see what has become of the once strong program he built.). Anyhoo, TCU proved that the MWC is indded strong with a really good defensive performance even though their offense tried like hell to give the game away.

Look Ahead to the SHERATON HAWAII BOWL:

Fatter Tuna (Sorry, Charlie) is going to call the plays in Hawaii. Seeing as how the Rainbow Warriors (I know it is really just warriors, but the gay imagery is just to funny to conjure up here) can play some 'D', I expect ND to complete their second straight losing season.

Many ND apologists keep making excuses for Weis by saying that he is loading up ND with talent. My guess is that most recruiting services are rating players ND recruits higher just because they are recruited by ND. There are many stories you can find through the blogosphere that suggest this is true. I wouldn't be surprised to learn someday that there is a backdoor deal Weis has with Lemming just to keep his recruiting numbers high.

Personally, I could care less if ND keeps him or fies him. It affects me very little. They can waste their money on that bloated windbag as the rest of America just laughs. My bigger concern is that they might one day hire someone who actually has a clue how to recruit and coach football.

Kids at the Bris

I took Eliana, Jessa and Zev to a Bris yesterday. Eliana and Jessa were very excited to get to see a "little baby".

We arrived and they were not disappointed. Eliana said, "Aww, baby Micah is so cute. Look how little he is!"

I carefully chose a seat. One where we could see baby Micah, but not necessarily see all of the "action". I felt oh-so-smart as they placed baby Micah down on the pillow and the girls could see his head, but not much else. As the Mohel started his work, Eliana notices the scalpel and says "what is he cutting?"

I gave her a thoughtful, but correct reply and added, "it's the same thing that happened to Zev at his bris."

Not a second later, Zev says "What they cutting?"

Eliana immediately interjects with a high level of confidence, "its the same thing that happened to you are your bris."

Luckily, he accepted her answer as fact and let it go.

Bowl Results volume 1

Bowl games from December 2, 2008, with commentary. My original winning pick has the *.

EAGLEBANK BOWL
Wake Forest 29
*Navy 19

I figured that there was nothing materially different about this game than the first they played this year. The first half was similar to that first game. However, Wake showed up for the the fourth quarter this time and that is why the results are different.

MAGICJACK ST. PETERSBURG BOWL
Memphis 14
*South Florida 41

In a matchup of really crappy teams, one looks for some reason to pick one over the other. In what is essentially a home game for USF, I figured they would be better prepared to win.

NEW MEXICO BOWL
*Colorado St 40
Fresno St 35

I went with conference strength on this one. Plus I figure Pat Hill jumped the shark about three years ago. The giant killing Fresno of a few years ago with their "Anyone, any time, any place" motto seems completely dead at this point.

PIONEER LAS VEGAS BOWL
*(16) Brigham Young 21
Arizona 31

I figured the MWC owned the PAC-10 this year and why stop now. With a very good MWC team playing a crappy PAC-10 team, you don't go against that trend. Shows you how much I know. I guess we can take Stoops off the hot seat and give him Crappy Bowl Winning mediocre coach status. Whoop-de-freakin-do.

R+L CARRIERS NEW ORLEANS BOWL
Southern Miss 30
*Troy 27

Wow. A complete toss up game between two teams that serve as scare fodder for BCS teams. What a game though. Fitting it went to OT since pick 'em status seemed the only real way to handicap this one.

Bowl Game Picks 2008

Howdy Folks. After a somewhat dismal record picking games last year, I am going to give it another whirl this year. I will make the picks in a quickly in list fashion and follow later with posts on any items of hilarity or interest. Onto the picks (winners denoted by *):

EAGLEBANK BOWL
Wake Forest (7-5, 4-4 ACC)
*Navy (8-4, 4-2 home)

MAGICJACK ST. PETERSBURG BOWL
Memphis (6-6, 4-4 C-USA)
*South Florida (7-5, 2-5 Big East)

NEW MEXICO BOWL
*Colorado St (6-6, 4-4 MWC)
Fresno St (7-5, 4-4 WAC)

PIONEER LAS VEGAS BOWL
*(16) Brigham Young (10-2, 6-2 MWC)
Arizona (7-5, 5-4 Pac-10)

R+L CARRIERS NEW ORLEANS BOWL
Southern Miss (6-6, 4-4 C-USA)
*Troy (8-4, 6-1 S. Belt)

SAN DIEGO COUNTY CREDIT UNION POINSETTIA BOWL
(9) Boise St (12-0, 8-0 WAC)
*(11) TCU (10-2, 7-1 MWC)

SHERATON HAWAII BOWL
*Hawaii (7-6, 5-3 WAC)
Notre Dame (6-6, 4-2 home)

MOTOR CITY BOWL
Florida Atlantic (6-6, 4-3 S. Belt)
*Central Michigan (8-4, 6-2 MAC)

MEINEKE CAR CARE BOWL
West Virginia (8-4, 5-2 Big East)
*North Carolina (8-4, 4-4 ACC)

EMERALD BOWL
Miami (FL) (7-5, 4-4 ACC)
*California (8-4, 6-3 Pac-10)

CHAMPS SPORTS BOWL
Wisconsin (7-5, 3-5 Big Ten)
*Florida St (8-4, 5-3 ACC)

INDEPENDENCE BOWL
*Northern Illinois (6-6, 5-3 MAC)
Louisiana Tech (7-5, 5-3 WAC)

PAPAJOHNS.COM BOWL
North Carolina St (6-6, 4-4 ACC)
*Rutgers (7-5, 5-2 Big East)

VALERO ALAMO BOWL
*(21) Missouri (9-4, 5-3 Big 12)
(23) Northwestern (9-3, 5-3 Big Ten)

ROADY'S HUMANITARIAN BOWL
Maryland (7-5, 4-4 ACC)
*Nevada (7-5, 5-3 WAC)

PACIFIC LIFE HOLIDAY BOWL
(13) Oklahoma St (9-3, 5-3 Big 12)
*(17) Oregon (9-3, 7-2 Pac-10)

TEXAS BOWL
Western Michigan (9-3, 6-2 MAC)
*Rice (9-3, 7-1 C-USA)

BELL HELICOPTER ARMED FORCES BOWL
Houston (7-5, 6-2 C-USA)
*Air Force (8-4, 5-3 MWC)

GAYLORD HOTELS MUSIC CITY BOWL
*(24) Boston College (9-4, 5-3 ACC)
Vanderbilt (6-6, 4-4 SEC)

CHICK-FIL-A BOWL
LSU (7-5, 3-5 SEC)
*(14) Georgia Tech (9-3, 5-3 ACC)

SUN BOWL
*Oregon St (8-4, 7-2 Pac-10)
(20) Pittsburgh (9-3, 5-2 Big East)

INSIGHT BOWL
*Kansas (7-5, 4-4 Big 12)
Minnesota (7-5, 3-5 Big Ten)

OUTBACK BOWL
*South Carolina (7-5, 4-4 SEC)
Iowa (8-4, 5-3 Big Ten)

GATOR BOWL
*Nebraska (8-4, 5-3 Big 12)
Clemson (7-5, 4-4 ACC)

FEDEX ORANGE BOWL
*(12) Cincinnati (11-2, 6-1 Big East)
(19) Virginia Tech (9-4, 5-3 ACC)

CAPITAL ONE BOWL
*(15) Georgia (9-3, 6-2 SEC)
(18) Michigan St (9-3, 6-2 Big Ten)

THE ROSE BOWL GAME PRESENTED BY CITI
(8) Penn St (11-1, 7-1 Big Ten)
*(5) USC (11-1, 8-1 Pac-10)

COTTON BOWL
*(25) Mississippi (8-4, 5-3 SEC)
(7) Texas Tech (11-1, 7-1 Big 12)

ALLSTATE SUGAR BOWL
(6) Utah (12-0, 8-0 MWC)
*(4) Alabama (12-1, 8-0 SEC)

AUTOZONE LIBERTY BOWL
*Kentucky (6-6, 2-6 SEC)
East Carolina (9-4, 6-2 C-USA)

INTERNATIONAL BOWL
Buffalo (8-5, 5-3 MAC)
*Connecticut (7-5, 3-4 Big East)

TOSTITOS FIESTA BOWL
(10) Ohio St (10-2, 7-1 Big Ten)
*(3) Texas (11-1, 7-1 Big 12)

GMAC BOWL
(22) Ball St (12-1, 8-0 MAC)
*Tulsa (10-3, 7-1 C-USA)

FEDEX BCS NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP GAME
*(2) Florida (12-1, 7-1 SEC)
(1) Oklahoma (12-1, 7-1 Big 12)

Funny Kid Stuff

Eliana

Eliana was sleeping in our bed and I went to move her to her own. She was completely dead to the world. As I picked her up, still dreaming, she started moving her hand as if it was swinging from the elbow (think Rodney Dangerfield after the ball struck him in Caddyshack), the said:

One little idee idee with the hand...a-cat-a-DOO-la!

The voice she used was weird too. As if she had just inhaled helium. She then was real quiet and passed a huge gas. So, I am not sure what my kid dreams about, but it seems quite whack.

Jessa

After dropping Jessa off at daycare this week, Dorann realized she had forgotten to sign her and Zev in. She went back to the room to sign them in and Jessa was very pleased to see her. She says, "Mommy, you came back!"

Dorann: Yes, I did, Jessa. Mommy forgot to sign you in.

Jessa: (small pause) Mommy, you're so funny.

Zev

Zev was such a helpful guy this week. I had made bagels for the big 3 to eat while we got ready in the morning. Zev was happy to be the delivery boy for his sisters. He brings their bagels up the stairs and gives them to Eliana and Jessa with a "Here you go!" and provides "You're welcome!" in response to their thank yous.

Under Construction 2

Update to current day with new pictures!

It is hard to accurately describe how fast this project seems to be moving along. Dorann is doing a great job making sure that our contractors have information ahead of when they need it so that we cause no delays. I went out to snap some shots tonight and hopefully you can get a picture of what things will look like.

Click on image to enlarge:

1) View of new covered porch at rear of addition:


2) Outside view of away room (room behind the garage). The window juts out from the room and will have a built-in bench. I really like the interesting roof angles.


3) Another View of the porch. Dorann is picking the columns now. The bricks look good!


4) View of kitchen and existing Dining room:


5) This will be the doorway to enter the expanded dining room. The wall behind the new door will be going bye bye.


6) The away room main window. A bench will be built in front of the window for enjoying a good read while relaxing inside.


7) Cathedral ceiling in new family room/kitchen. We are making sure to have plenty of lighting which is a huge complaint we have with existing rooms in the house.


8) The new kitchen will be placed here. There will be a 9+ foot island with a large eat-in area for barstools. We can imagine the crew having breakfast there for many years to come.


9) I am standing in the new kitchen looking toward the Away Room. The high windows should give a nice view of the Smith's colorful bushes in Spring.


What is truly amazing is that the basic outside frame was up within a week of the previous post. The guys have been working on framing the interior rooms and closets, adding windows, and getting ready for electrical and heating to be added next.

Zev, Jessa, Eliana, and Davica are still enjoying watching the guys come in a work in the mornings. Eliana especially looks forward to seeing Mr. Dave, as she is a hopeless flirt.

Under Construction

Hola! I write today to give you some detail on our little construction project here in the Maryland suburbs, including pictures! We are in the process of adding a new kitchen and family room, ground floor bedroom and expanding our dining room. The whole process has been terribly exciting to the kids. Every day, they wake up to see what Mr. Dave and the crew will be working on.

First, some before shots. View of rear of house:


View from garage side of deck:

View from above deck:


Now some in-process pics! View of 'no deck' (i.e. big hole) from kitchen:


Cutting re bar with the fire-saw!


View from back of house after foundations well under way:


Top view with the new stone porch:


More will be coming soon. As you can see, the grass is completely destroyed. Luckily, we have a lot of useful dirt that was removed from where the deck used to be. The dirt can be used for building support walls for landscaping, supporting the foundation, and best of all, it doesn't cost anything.

Tales from the Barf Side

Emetophobia. That is the technical term for what I have. Fear of vomit, barf, technicolor yawn, bort, etc.

People pay good money to get cured of such things. I am lucky enough to have my own systematic desensitization program occurring on what has become, seemingly, a daily basis in my house. The program's name is Jessa and she is a 23 pound barfing machine.

Fans (or perhaps I should say, The Fan) of this blog may recall a previous post where she got home and held it together just in time to barf all over me. Well, this week, she has surpassed that one. She has tagged me twice in the same week! Now to give the girl credit, she really seems to want to make it to the toilet. I would say that about 75% of her barf content makes it to the toilet. Which is very good for a 2 year old.

The highlight of tonight came at approximately 8:07 pm, when I was holding the sickly Jessa, while talking to the pediatrician on the phone. In the middle of the conversation, Jessa starts to barf, tagging me and the kitchen floor in the process. I rush to get her to the toilet where she finishes the rest of the job. Eliana, being 4 and not being as interested in following instructions when she is getting tired, ignores the instructions of Dorann and heads down the stairs to find her lovey. As she starts to walk through the barf, I break from the conversation with the doctor to yell at her to get back upstairs. She runs up the stairs crying. Poor Jessa is sobbing in front of the toilet. My pediatrician, I am sure is deciding to report me to county authorities, but still finishes the conversation to provide expert advice for caring for the poor girl the rest of the evening.

Fifteen minutes after the incident, all of the kids were asleep. Which just goes to show you how resilient they can be, even when their parents are far from perfect.

Kid-isms

1) Jessa: I saw that dear, mommy!
Dorann: What it a boy dear or a girl dear
Jessa: A boy dear
Dorann: How did you know it was a boy dear?
Jessa: Because it had knees.

2) Doug: This is the song mommy and daddy danced to at their wedding.
Eliana: I didn't get to see that.
Doug: But you have seen the video of it.
Eliana: But I wasn't here yet. I was with Mr. God.

3) Zev: Daddy, mommy is pretty!
Doug: You should go tell mommy that.
Zev: Mommy, you're pretty (hugs and kisses)
Dorann: *speechless*

4) Jessa and Eliana brush Davica's hair.
Davica: smiles
Zev tickles her feet.
Davica: smiles
Jessa brings her a toy
Davica: smiles

Envirolets

http://envirolet.com

Waterless toilets.

Let that one just hang there for a while. In theory using less water is a good idea, but composting one's own feces in a box within a structure is a bit of a trade-off. Open-field defecation may actually be more palatable.

Barf

As a father of four, you may be surprised to learn that I am somewhat petrified of barf. Greatly fear doing it myself, abhor the thought of it, don't really even like jokes about it. 

So today, much to my chagrin, I was full-scale barfed on by my middle daughter (27 months old). The poor thing was running a fever and we had just gotten out of the car. As I was carrying her into the house, she unloaded all over my shirt and pants. And to be fair, all over herself. 

I started to wonder if I am perhaps lucky for going so long as a father without this happening before. Sure, when infants, the kids have crapped, spit-up, drooled and peed on me. For some reason, that didn't really bother me. The horror of looking down and seeing recognizable food items on my shirt was not exactly the best part of my day. 

After getting the sickly little girl inside, I cleaned her up, read her some stories and rocked her to sleep. I have checked on her about 4 times since she went to sleep and all seems well. Here is to her speedy recovery.

I made the Graphjam Blog

Problem is they screwed up the axes of my graph, which makes it not nearly as funny. It was supposed to go from 1 to 5 and 5 to 1, respectively, for men and women. Cutting of the last bit definitely hurts the impact. Oh well.

Go to the voting pages to vote for my graph if you want it to make the main site. If not, just go straight to hell.


more song chart memes

Presidential Commentary

Earlier in the day, Eliana, (now 3 and a half), Jessa and Zev (both 22 months) were excited to see the president's helicopter fly over our house. The kids looked and pointed. I told Eliana that the president of the United States, flies in that machine. She added, "of America!"

Later, while eating lunch, we were talking about seeing the helicopter with Dorann and she asked Eliana if she knew the president's name. Before I give her response, know that we generally don't discuss politics with the kids and have never given her our opinion of the current administration. Her reply:

"Turkey!"

How are the Picks, Part 5

FIESTA BOWL
Jan. 2, West Virginia (10-2) vs. Oklahoma (11-2)
My Pick: Sooners 31, Mountaineers 23
Result: Mountaineers 48, Sooners 28

WVU came out swinging and rolled in this game. OU comes out flat in the BCS yet again. I was very surprised at this result and am not sure what this means for Stoops as a coach. Lots of good coaches go through stretches of good and bad bowl results. Nebraska's Osbourne was the perennial bowl loser before turning the corner and dominating the mid 90s. Congrats to Stewart on winning a job with the victory, but I believe such appointments are almost always destined for failure.

ORANGE BOWL
Jan. 3, Kansas (11-1) vs. Virginia Tech (11-2)
My Pick: Hokies 27, Kansas 18
Result: Kansas 24, Hokies 21

Kansas comes in and at least proves my analysis sorely lacking. If Va. Tech at least had any offense, they probably would have easily won this game.

INTERNATIONAL BOWL
Jan. 5, Rutgers (7-5) vs. Ball State (7-5)
My Pick: Rutgers 28, Ball State 24
Result: Rutgers 52, Ball State 30

Rutgers dominates in game at held the interest of tens of fans.

GMAC BOWL
Jan. 6, Tulsa (9-4) vs. Bowling Green (8-4)
My Pick: Tulsa 33, Bowling Green 23.
Result: Tulsa 63, Bowling Green 7

Holy shit. I am guessing Arkansas would have actually liked to have an offense that could do that week in and week out versus what Houston Nutt gave them this year and last.

Record in this post: 2-2
Cumulative record for Bowl Season: 16-13

At least I am guaranteed a winning record for bowl season at this point.

How are the Picks, Part 4

OUTBACK BOWL
Jan. 1, Wisconsin (9-3) vs. Tennessee (9-4)
My Pick: Wisconsin 9, Tennessee 8
Result: Tennessee 21, Wisconsin 17

Boring game between two boring teams. Wow. I am on the edge of my seat for a Vol win. Yeeha.
COTTON BOWL
Jan. 1, Missouri (11-2) vs. Arkansas (8-4)
My Pick: Missouri 35, Arkansas 23
Result: Missouri 38, Arkansas 7

Arkansas was even less into the game than expected. I don't care what McFadden says, he was mentally checked out and thinking about not hurting himself for the huge signing bonus he will get post NFL draft day.

GATOR BOWL
Jan. 1, Virginia (9-3) vs. Texas Tech (8-4)
My Pick: Red Raiders 56, UVa 35
Result: Red Raiders 31, UVa 28

Tech guts out a win in a game featuring a horrible leg injury late in the 4th. Much closer than I thought, but Al Groh's inability to be imaginative is always something you can count on.

CAPITAL ONE
Jan. 1, Michigan (8-4) vs. Florida (9-3)
My Pick: Gators 49, Wolverines 19
Result: Wolverines 41, Gators 35

I should have listened to my doubts about the ability of the Gator defense to hold any opponent down. Kudos to Carr and Michigan for a well played win. Darts to the Gator defenders for their abundance of trash talking in the game. I would hope Meyer will remind them in the future that supposed SEC supremacy does not matter once the whistle blows against an equally talented opponent.

ROSE BOWL
Jan. 1, USC (10-2) vs. Illinois (9-3)
My Pick: USC 39, Illinois 17
Result: USC 49, Illinois 17

USC pulls way away in the second half as Illinois finally wakes up and realizes that they are Illinois.

SUGAR BOWL
Jan. 1, Hawaii (12-0) vs. Georgia (10-2)
My Pick: Georgia 38, Hawaii 21
Result: Georgia 41, Hawaii 10

The result never in doubt in this game, too bad Brennan actually completed any passes whatsoever.

Record in this post: 4-2
Cumulative record for Bowl Season: 14-11

How are the Picks, Part 3

INDEPENDENCE BOWL
Dec. 30, Colorado (6-6) vs. Alabama (6-6)
My Pick: Bama 23, Colorado 17
Result: Bama 30, Colorado 24

Both teams seemed to genuinely want to win this. The Tide jumped out to a lead that the Buffs could not overcome. Both teams are likely very happy to be leaving Shreveport.

ARMED FORCES BOWL
Dec. 31, Cal (6-6) vs. Air Force (9-3)
My Pick: Falcons 35, Bears 21
Result: Bears 42, Falcons 36

After jumping out to a huge lead, the Bears finally decide to run it and throw it down the Falcons throat behind their backup QA. I guessTedford finally woke up and took an interest in coaching for a living.

SUN BOWL
Dec. 31, USF (9-3) vs. Oregon (8-4)
My Pick: USF 42, Oregon 17
Result: Oregon 56, USF 21

Holy shit! I fell quite the fool. Not even close. Where was this Oregon team the last three weeks of the season.

HUMANITARIAN BOWL
Dec. 31, Fresno State (8-4) vs. Georgia Tech (7-5)
My Pick: Georgia Tech 26, Fresno State 23
Result: Fresno State 40, Georgia Tech 28

Interim coaches are taking it on the chin this year. Fresno finishes strong.

MUSIC CITY BOWL
Dec. 31, Florida State (7-5) vs. Kentucky (7-5)
My Pick: Kentucky 49, FSU 20
Result: Kentucky 35, FSU 28

FSU keeps it much closer that I thought they would. Bobby Bowden heads into 2008 with a one game lead over Jo Pa. This could get interesting.On the other side of the ball, UK to return to doormat obscurity next season.

INSIGHT BOWL
Dec. 31, Indiana (7-5) vs. Oklahoma State (6-6)
My Pick: OSU 44, Indiana 14
Result: OSU 49, Indiana 33

Indiana still has a fine season considering all they had to deal with. Let's hope they can keep it up next season. OSU will head into 2008 with some momentum, but don't expect any major leaps forward.

CHICK-FIL-A BOWL
Dec. 31, Clemson (9-3) vs. Auburn (8-4)
My Pick: Clemson 35, Auburn 31
Result: Auburn 23, Clemson 20 (OT)

I thought this game would be close and it was. The difference was the Auburn defense. Muschamp is sure to get a HC job in the next year or two.

Record in this post: 3-4
Cumulative record for Bowl Season: 10-9